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Home > School and digital communication: 7 tips for parents

School and digital communication: 7 tips for parents.

The digital world is here to stay. Communication with and at school also happens mostly online. The same goes for talks with classmates and peers. Of course, this affects how your child feels at school. How do you deal with this? We give you 7 tips.

1. Discuss the school rules with your child

Good manners help create a pleasant school climate, both online and offline. It helps when teachers and parents are on the same page. Your child will feel better at school and beyond.

What are the school rules about using phones? Which apps does the school use to communicate with you and your child? And what agreements have been made about contact with teachers? You can usually find this in the school guide. Parents in the school participation council help decide about the phone and app policy at school.

Problems can especially happen with class chat groups. Ask the school how they handle this:

Are teachers in the class chat?
Are there rules about what is allowed by the school?
What does the school do when things go wrong in the class chat?

2. Teach your child respectful online behaviour

Talk to your child about the online world and their online experiences, from a young age. Ask what videos they have seen online or talk together about a TV show. Then you can discuss how to handle it, what is fun, what is hard, and what risks there are.

Make sure your child understands to be respectful online. Bullying, sharing mean or explicit videos, and excluding children is not okay. Remember the digital grey area is large, with jokes that can be funny and well meaning but not always for everyone. Talk with your child about what the limits are for them. When you make rules together, your child understands why it is important and they usually follow the rules better.

3. Set a good example

Your child copies your behaviour. So act the way you want your child to act. Be respectful when you talk about school and peers. Do not expect a reply outside school hours and do not check constantly for grades or attendance online.
Tip: use the WAIT principle and teach it to your child. Before you post something online, ask yourself these questions: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it important? Does it help everyone? And: is the timing right?

Read more about the WAIT principle on the Kennisnet website

4. Share experiences with the school

Digital technology changes fast and what children see and experience online is not always easy to follow. Do you hear from your child that something is happening? For example, mean videos being shared, children secretly bringing phones to class, or a new dangerous TikTok trend? Then tell the school. They can respond in class and take fitting action.

Primary and secondary schools focus on digital literacy: digital knowledge and skills. Every school is required to do this. Your child learns to see and use digital technologies, but also the risks.

Read what the school teaches your child about digital literacy

5. Give your child space

From the last years of primary school, your child asks for more freedom. This can be scary. So start with small steps. For example, at first read the class chat weekly and talk about it. You can slowly look less and less.

Let your child solve hard situations as much as possible. Even when it is hard, your child builds confidence from this. Of course, you are there to talk about what is the best way to handle the situation.

Many secondary schools also use a student monitoring system or digital learning platform, for example SOMtoday or Magister. These show information about absence, class schedules, and grades. Sometimes you as a parent get new grades before your child. Try not to watch closely too much. Give your child space to tell you themselves, even about low grades or skipping class. Is it getting worse? Then you intervene.

6. Make agreements about safety and emergencies

Since the new rules about mobile phones at school, your child has less phone access at school. This can be hard. For example, if your child is bullied, needs special care, or there is an emergency at home or school.

Talk to the school about what agreements you make. For example, that there is someone at school your child can always trust or that there is a fixed contact person for your child and you as a parent. The school safety policy has all general agreements about this.

Read more about the school's safety policy

7. Find balance between online and offline

Your child’s brain is still developing. Using the phone a lot can affect this negatively. It is important to have a good balance between screen time, rest, and activities. Talk about this with your child and make agreements about how long, which apps, and when your child may be online.

Important rules to keep in mind:

The 20-20 rule: After 20 minutes of looking at a screen, look 20 seconds into the distance. This lowers the risk of nearsightedness.
Make sure your child is outside at least 2 hours a day. This helps your child’s physical and mental health.
Evening rest: Your child sleeps better if there is no screen time at least one hour before bedtime. Put the phone away on time and keep it downstairs.

This article was made with Remco Pijpers from Kennisnet. More useful information is on the sites digitalebalans.nl by Netwerk Mediawijsheid and the Trimbos Instituut.

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